THE REPUBLICAN

November 26, 1880

 

How to have a bad School.

 

1.      Elect the most ignorant, bigoted close-fisted fogies in the district for the school board.

2.      Employ the cheapest teacher you can get, regardless of qualifications, reputation and experience.

3.      Find all the fault you can with the teacher, and tell everybody; especially, let the pupils hear it.

4.      When you hear a bad report about the teacher of the school, circulate it as fast as you can.

5.      Never visit the school nor encourage the teacher.

6.      If you should happen to visit the school, take close notice of what seems to go wrong, and tell everybody about it, expect the teacher.

7.      Never advise your children to be obedient to the teacher, and when one is punished, rush to the schoolroom before your passion is cooled, and give the teacher a lecture in the matter in the presence of the school.

8.      Be indifferent about sending your children to school regularly.

9.      Do not be concerned whether they have the necessary books.

10.  If any of the pupils make slow progress, blame the teacher for it.

11.  Occupy your old tumbled down schoolhouse as long as you can, and do not go to any expense to repair it.

12.  Do not go to any expense to get apparatus, improved furniture, etc.

13.  If the teacher or pupils complain of an uncomfortable or inconvenient schoolroom, do not consider it worthy of notice.

14.  Get the cheapest fuel you can.

 

In general, conduct your school on the cheapest possible plan, and let your chief concern be to find fault and devise ways of retrenchment.

           If these rules are faithfully carried out you are very likely to have a bad school.